A New Day

Yesterday I had to make a trip into Spokane for an oil change - it was not an easy decision for me to make, but I decided to go see Grandma Helen.  She's probably just days if not hours away from being in Heaven - beautiful for her, very difficult for those left here.  Litney has been such a strong person for Grandma - always there with her every step of the way.  There's a connection between she and grandma that no other grandchild has - although grandma loves ALL her grandchildren, and I know she does, Litney is just special after living with her for a year.  Here I am driving around the block a few times to see if I could do it:( !!  God gave me the strength and I decided - yes, maybe it was me coming into grandma's room and telling her what an amazing mother-in-law she'd been to me, how I loved her son, and how we had the best grandkids for her ever!!  So that's what I did!!!  Kelley was there in the room - she was the perfect one for me!  I instantly was in tears when I opened the door and Kelley just put her arms around me and hugged me tight.  I needed that!!!  Grandma has been somewhat unresponsive for about three days - some of her last words were last Friday the 11th telling Larissa that she loved her.  Litney put the phone to grandma's ear so Larissa could talk - very hard for Larissa to do that - she's so much like me - we just cry!!

So I sat for over two hours - watching, listening, crying - no longer is grandma Helen the same - her body is still with us, but she's not!  But maybe she could still "hear" so I took the opportunity to tell her I loved her and how special she'd been in my life.  Never have I ever heard grandma Helen say a bad word about anyone - she was always so positive and uplifting!  I love her!!!

Shortly before I had to leave, Litney came in - put her purse and jacket on the floor and crawled up next to grandma and laid next to her.  What strength she has!!!  She stroked her hair, flipping little strands behind her ears, kept the rosary in her one hand and just smiled at her.  There is a love like no other there.  Litney adores grandma and she was a friend to her!  I sit here in tears as I write - so difficult to think about, so difficult to witness, so difficult to know that soon grandma Helen won't be here.  I'm not sure if today is the day or not, but grandma Helen is ready - she's been ready!  Litney tells me how she is reminiscing about old friends, about John, about grandpa Clyde, about playing in the creek when she was a child - these were all words days ago - nothing anymore.  Grandma Helen is ready to be with her maker, to be with God and let the rest of us remember her memories.  I'll always treasure my memories of her and all the great times we've had - she accepted me right from the moment I met her and there's been a special place in my heart for her!! 

While there yesterday I took this photo - I know it's not one that just everyone wants to see - so hard to see that fun-loving, smiling-face, now laying in a bed unable to even close her lips, unable to open her eyes - but there is continued life sitting next to her - a legacy that grandma can be proud of, a person that meant the world to grandma in the past few years calling her "My Girl" to all she was around.  Thank you Jesus for this day and for giving me grandma Helen, thank you Jesus for giving me my daughter Litney who is able to comfort grandma, and thank you for the new day coming!  Blessings to Grandma Helen, to Litney and to all!!